Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Little Things

Shane's love language is Acts of Service. I think this is sooooooooooo hard. I mean, mine is Quality Time. How easy is it to sit and chat? Maybe his could be words of affirmation and I could just say, "Way to go!" or "I love you." But, no. For him to feel loved I need to fold socks, make his lunch, run errands for him, and so on and so forth. I hope you know I am half kidding here. I actually enjoy this serving thing. I mean, it is my role in life, right? Right. But, it is a little hard for me at times to serve in the capacity that he does for me.
Shane is a great server. He likes to get up and make me breakfast. I used to do that, for like our first week of marriage. I would get up with him at 5 and while he was showering, I would pour the cereal in his bowl, but not the milk...he hates soggy cereal. Then I would wander back to bed. I didn't have to be at work until 8. After about 5 days of that, I decided it was a bit ridiculous. So no more breakfast.
In addition, Shane has done a lot of changing for me over the years. I try not to nag, but share things I would like to not have to take care of for the next 80 years and he tries hard to help. Things Shane has changed for the sole purpose of making me happy: putting down the toilet seat, shutting the shower curtain, putting his stuff (keys, mail, wallet) in one area of the house (still working on this one...), putting the food used to cook away before we sit down to eat a meal, not leaving cooking items on the stove that could blow up the house while cooking (the olive oil spray in an aerosol container), shutting cabinet doors, you get the idea. Shane doesn't ask me for much.
But... one thing he cannot stand, and I seem to fail every time is, having to put sheets on the bed when it is very late and he just wants to sleep. We both enjoy clean sheets. I like to clean them at least once a week. But, I often forget to put them in the dryer and then end up having to stay up late to wait for them to dry and then require his help to put them on when he is soooooooooooo tired. Understandable. So I try, and I try.
Tonight it is late and I am working on a few things here on the computer. Shane is out doing a few things with the business and won't be home for a couple of hours. I remembered that the sheets were in the dryer and actually put them on myself. In the meantime, I straightened up his dresser and cleaned up the floor. I turned down the sheets and turned on his reading lamp. I also changed out of my labor gown I bought to labor in with Annalee. It is so comfortable and I didn't actually use it, but the point is that it fit 9 mths pregnant and has a horizontal pink striped pattern on it. You can imagine. So, I put on a tank top and some yoga pants. No big deal. Love is in the small things.


~The Ketters~ said...

I had never heard of the "love language" you spoke of in this post. So, I googled it. I found the book, and his other books. How interesting! I want to read them now. Thank you for mentioning it!

Here we go... said...

Jen, I think that book is vital for marriages. My other favorite is His Needs Her Needs.

Sara said...

Yes...wonderful book! There is an older couple in our church who does the Love Languages study several times a year for younger couples. What a ministry!

Anywhoo...great thoughts here. I love your room...it's gorgeous. And the photos are so fun. It warmed my heart to see some of the pics I've snapped over the years on your wall. Miss you and love you my friend! xxoo

Natalie said...

Don't we all love covering our walls in pictures by Sara. I think I have one in each room. Anyway, Kris ministered to my love language in a BIG way yesterday by taking me on a whole day date. His mom was in town so she watched all the kiddos while we went out for breakfast, did devotions together, window shopped in little shops in downtown Denver, went to the art museum, had lunch at a little cafe, and then I talk him the card game "rook" which was the most loving thing he did all day. He doesn't like games but all on his own, he asked if I would teach him how to play so he could play with my family during Christmas. It made me think of how love is mostly about sacrifice. I feel very loved. Now to work on making him supremely happy.

angela said...

Your room is so pretty, Jackie!!
Love languages is a great book. It really helps me understand how to show my love to Charlie because he is service and I am physical touch.