Monday, February 22, 2010
This is me in the oven. Well, me, reflected in the oven. That would be dumb. Really. I sit at the counter while working on the computer often. My children, in the background, are always in the background. My children follow me everywhere I go. I noticed that I do the same thing to Shane. If he goes to the office, I do too. If he goes to the shower, well, I all of a suden have the urge to brush my teeth or something bathroom related. I think it is interesting our need for comany. I also treasure my alone time, but I have enough of that by the time he gets home. When it snowed for many days in a row, Shane was home for about three days straight. We didn't go anywhere, just stayed in. On the third day we sat down at the breakfast table and he asked me if there was something wrong. I said, "No. Why?" He replied, "Because you aren't talking." I laughed and realized this poor man knows nothing of the quiet Jackie. I am quiet most of the day. I talk to no one about my deep thoughts, frustrations or excitement. I share things with my kids that would pertain to them. I teach them things. I share loving words, but you know...a 2 year old can only handle so much. So, Shane get it all when he comes home. The Jackie he knows talks nearly non-stop. He of course has known this for years. I just realized this. Wow, and he still loves me. I can only imagine how many nights I have bombarded him when he was so very tired, or frustrated, or just over hearing. He hears all day. He works in a gym where music is played loudly the entire time. He talks with clients for hours and hours. He listens to other people talking around him, for hours. He hears the clanging of metal weights and the spinning of treadmills. He hears intercome pages and laughter from the pools. He hears the base from the groupx room and the tempo from the cycle room. When he does have down time he is in a consult room on the phone with clients. Maybe I should start talking to my self during the day to give him a break. Do you think writing your words, as in writing this blog entry, counts for all the words we "have" each day?